So yeah, I kinda lost containment the last couple days. The truth, I am suffering from depression. At times I succumb to fits of the sullens. And I am a gamer. I do not think that the combinations of these two things are unique to my human condition.
Which is why I started this blog. I have not been posting of late for a number of reasons, too long to even record in blog format. Or at least too much info for public consumption.
I want to continue this blog as well as my other which will focus entirely on the happier aspects of community gaming because it helps me to write. I also hope that by continuing an open dialog it will help some one else who may also struggle as I do.
I am disappointed by SOE’s decision as presented in yesterday’s blog. I am more disappointed in myself for losing containment. That said, after taking a step back to breathe and gain perspective, I am feeling much better.
What I want is not something that is going to happen overnight. It is going to take years really for me to get to where I am going. Right now, I am stuck in a bit of a holding pattern while I wait for a few things that are out of my control.
But I have set a goal. I have found my peers. I believe that I will find happiness in the pursuit of my goal. Even if it does not turn out exactly the way I plan.
And now for some motivizational shit. Maybe cliché, but it works for me.